It has been more than a week since I wrote about my En-cunt-er with the United States Judicial System and so I am back although I am behind schedule on all walks of life. Even my period is late
.
However, before I continue on my usual rage filled endeavor, I would like to say that the United States Judicial System is quite cool. I'm not sure how else you could have a fair and just system, if at all, but I guess we do alright considering I get to keep my hands after getting caught with a goose underneath my car...
Not that I was...I mean...I wasn't guilty...the pastor made me do it. Yeah, that's it. The pastor. I'm so ashamed.
However, if you have any better ideas on how to create a fair judicial system, please let me know and I'll take it up with the board. Or at least talk about it on this here weblog.
Let's turn our attention to more pressing matters. The judicial system can wait. This is what really takes the kicker.
Two stabbed and two arrested in convent fracas
Thu Apr 12, 8:19 PM ET
NICOSIA (Reuters) - Two people were stabbed and two arrested in scuffles at a Cyprus convent on Thursday in a power struggle between rival factions, police said.
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Witnesses said priests and nuns were involved in the night-time fracas at the Metamorphosis tou Sotiros convent, some 35 km (22 miles) south east of the Cypriot capital Nicosia.
Disputes there have been simmering for months over control of its speculated vast wealth.
The people injured and those arrested were laymen, police said. "Two required stitches for head injuries inflicted by sharp implements and two were detained for obstructing police," a police source told Reuters.
The convent follows the old Julian calendar and is not considered part of the official Orthodox Church of Cyprus. Last December a nun at the convent was hospitalised following an assault.
NUNS SHOWDOWN 2007!! Whoo! I would like a Tshirt with those exact words. Cause there ain't a thing better than a flying nun than a fighting nun. I mean, if you step away and take a look at the obvious, you'll admit that nuns will kick your ass.
Example 1: I direct your attention to any Catholic School. The mild mannered nun hides a switch or ruler to implement the hand smack of death to anyone who dares tread on Jesus' name. Jesus' girls don't take smack about their lord and savior lightly. The feeling of that handsmack, although arousing, is soon followed by a giant purple welt across the palm. What commoners refer to as the mark of shame. Not to be confused with the mark of the beast. Which is characteristically found on the nether regions. Not that you will ever see that. That's for Jesus.
Example 2: They wear black. Perfect for sneak attacks in the dark. Stealthy stealthy ninjas. The traditional uniform also allows for the storage of hidden weapons, much like the aforementioned ruler or a shank carved from a crucifix and on rare occasions, mop handles or bedposts.
Example 3: They have a lot of pent up sexual tension. Tapping into that reservior of boiling juices results in mental state similar to Wolverine's Beserker Fury.
Example 4:What skill.
Example 5: You know in The Sound of Music where the nuns take out the spark plug in the car and thwart the Nazi incumbents from gaining on the Von Trapp Family Singers and then the Mother Superior leads the family through the wilderness? It is clear that nuns have uncanny abilities in mechanics thus in direct correlation: missle warfare. There is also clear evidence that nuns are reconissance/tracking experts and/or possess the ability to see in the dark.
Example 6: They are women.
Beware the nun. She kill you. You realize 5 minutes later.
Oh yeah, I don't use the word "fracas" enough.
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